I think there is some sort of Illegal Alien Apocalypse happening today. At least that’s what I gather reading the right-winger blogs. I turned on the news and what I saw mostly was parents and children, immigrants and Americans, marching, protesting and being human beings. But of course everyone knows that the main stream media is famously biased toward all things Anti-American. So I turned to the right-wing blogs to tell it like it is.
After reading the blogs of my friends from the right, I have barricaded my front door and installed search lights on top of my roof. The Illegals, Mexicans and Jihadis are expected to invade my neighborhood at any moment. I have stocked up on canned foods, water and duct tape. I am awaiting instructions from Debbie Schlussel as to what I should do next.
Now let me tell you why I am so panicked and what I read. Debbie Schlussel informs me that the Michigan Government has been taken over by Jihadis. In fact, the official Michigan web site apparently not only has documents in Spanish but also in Arabic. As Debbie tells it:
Our home state, Michigan, posts its webpage not just in en Espagnol, but in Arabic, too! All the better to welcome Jihadi illegal aliens to our country with open arms.
Our favorite items in Arabic:
* "Should I Be Suspicous?"
* "Description of DHS Administered Programs"
* Lots of Instructions on Getting IDs and SS#s, as well as Mucho Benefits (Maybe, it should be called "Fraud How-To Page in Arabic" )
Clearly this is a sign of Jihadi infiltration of our Government. Who knows what coded messages might be hidden in that Arabic text. And to think that the State is actually telling people how to apply for licenses and social security numbers – I am beside myself with this waste of tax payer funds. This is clearly a sign of the Apocalypse.
Debbie isn’t finished frightening me yet though. She also has a scoop about the nexus between Illegals and Jihadis in Detroit. After being informed by one of her readers that today was indeed May Day, Debbie also discerned a Communist plot. In true McCarthyite fashion she has also connected the dots between Illegals and Jihadis:
As we’ve lamented, in Michigan, illegal aliens are comprised by a significant number of Muslims, especially from the Middle East, many with Jihadi sympathies.
The only thing I am thankful for is that I live on the East Coast and this Jihadi horde seems to be concentrated in Detroit. But, I am keeping my eye out for any Arab I see. That Shakira and George Mitchell character have always raised my suspicions.
Back at the locust farm, Michelle Malkin is busy chronicling the events of the day. She’s got lots of links you’ll love if you love to hate. One of her links, however, stands out head and shoulders above the rest. Congressman Tom Tancredo imagines over at the National Review Online the many benefits of a day without illegal immigrants. He notes the many plusses in his wonderfully xenophobic world:
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Less people in hospital emergency rooms.
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Less people without health insurance.
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Fewer "anchor" babies born in American hospitals.
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Fewer gang members.
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Fewer child molesters.
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Fewer car thieves.
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Fewer methamphetamine addicts.
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Fewer murderers.
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Fewer murderers with suspended licenses.
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Less work for Border Patrol officers.
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States like Colorado would be much richer.
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Less overcrowded classrooms.
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Fewer high school drop-outs.
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Less overcrowded prisons.
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Fewer DUI arrests.
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Fewer SUV rollovers.
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More Americans working in construction.
Wow! Congressman Tancredo really hates undocumented aliens. I’m thinking of a world full of people just like Michelle Malkin, Debbie Schlussel and Tom Tancredo with Lou Dobbs to rule them all. What a wonderful world it would be. Then again, maybe not.
Mash,
What you liberals seem to ignore is the REAL issue with illegal aliens.
I am not talking about:mexicans, muslims, western europeans, etc. no..
The REAL threat are thosed damned illegal aliens who come from other planets and steal jobs from hard working americans!!
GET IT RIGHT!!
“I’m thinking of a world full of people just like…”
mash, what are you talking about, they already had a world, or country,like that… i do believe it was called hitler’s germany, or was the stalins russia, no, no, must have been musolini’s itali.. perhaps i meant francos spain… no no no, must have … sorry, my knowledge of fascist states ends there…
james, i do believe i saw one of them last week in the city!!! but, being nyc, it was probably just a hipster, yes, must have been, i was in chelsea at the time..
/:)
Mash
Thanks for pointing out another nut job from Michigan, my home. I thought they only ran for governor and ran barely legal pyramid schemes.
Tancredo missed a few items. Too whit
No one to weed his garden
no one to plant his pretty posies (posers?)
no one to pick his food
no one to launder his dirty clothes
no one to clean his floors
no one to wait on him at fashionable restaurants
no one to lug materials at his new home
And no one to work for the low wages he pays.
I hope you can follow up on his lower assorted crime rate theory. It seems quite amazing how people not working can not do all those terrible things, eh?
The ideals of our country are what inexorably draw people to our shores despite the Tancredo’s, Malkins, and Schlussel’s of the world. Their desire should humble us into realizing what we have been given by those who imagrated before us – A nation of opportunity and hope. We are all a product of the worlds diaspora.
“E pluribus unim” out of many, one. By the third generation, all imagrants decendants speak fluent English. This is the historical pattern. It worked this way on the Germans, Dutch, Poles, Italians, Chinese, Japanese, Phillipino,…
Seems to me the right wing base needs stirring and the usual sticks (gay marrage, flag burning, fiscal disipline, school prayer, and creationism) aren’t working. Is it a new mojo rising? I hope not as it shows the ugliest side of some of our people.
:)>-
I was in pain when I read the list by Tancredo! I was laughing so hard my mouth hurt! =))
“Taking away jobs” geez. What jobs are they exactly taking away?
If all those illegal aliens are good for nothing and if they are the reason for so much crime (according to Tancredo’s list) then how can they be taking away jobs from hard working Americans? What? Are the illegal immigrants taking away jobs from the hardworking American drug dealer?
Tancredo…what tribe is he descended from? Or did his people come over on the Mayflower?
Mash, it’s LAKingsFan57 here…
That list by Tom Tancredo was amusing. I don’t mean to correct TedB, but he forgot one of my all-time favorites…”no one to scrub his toilet”
BTW, that porterhouse steak I had last night in honor of Debbie Schlussel was awesome! \:d/
mmmm, steakkk!!!
PS: i live with a non-meat eater, so please, let me enjoy this vicarious moment.. :((
Robbie – much easier than typing LAKing… ;).
I don’t think anyone should have to scrub Tancredo’s toilets!:-&
I went to KFC yesterday and ordered a whole bunch of drumsticks. ~:>
dagnabbit…i looove kfc..!!!!
$^&%&^%%^#$&*^$(*^!!!!
how much does living in the bouse with a vegnetarian suck!:-w
I wish she’d actually linked to her comment about “Medicaid fraud for pregnant illegal aliens.” Given the fact that most public assistance is given pretty freely — thank goodness — for pregnant women, I’d like to know what she thought she was talking about.
Btw, tried to send you a specific cartoon from the Cagle.com collection on Immigration issues, but as usual the link didn’t work. Check the whole collection out.
Hey jim, I still owe you answers to the questions you sent me. As usual I am procrastinating…..:-“
Thoughtful and interesting, thank you. I grew up in manilla but moved to england at such a young age I can hardly remember anything apart from the delicious food. I finally found some authentic Filipino recipes if you want to take a look, I thought I’d share it with you!